Becoming Aware of Our Ego’s Addictions & Ending Our Struggle to Cope
By Jona Bryndis
The past months were characterized through the end of an old relationship cycle – with Self and others. Correctional processes like this can throw us off and often lead to a spiritual crisis, accompanied by excessive worrying, projecting fear or anger towards others or the world or the human experience all together. It triggers our ego – and with it our ego’s struggle for emotional, mental, physical or spiritual survival.
If you are witnessing the collapse of some of your dreams, hopes, health or even relationships at the moment – pay attention to where your inner sentiments go! As your ego is trying to figure out how to reinstate inner peace and status quo it is literally fighting its death! When this happens, without being aware of where your energy goes watch yourself going downhill, attaching more to your Coping Mechanisms. The problem with our ego’s coping is, that it tends to downward spiral us, which typically escalates the drama…
From an energetic point of view, our coping patterns show the same dynamics as our addictions. In fact, in energy healing we call them our Ego-Addictions. The only difference between a classic and ego addiction is, that ego is much harder to change it; willpower cannot help us with transcendeing our ego aspects . And just like overcoming other addiction it’s much more complex than simply abstaining from a substance or a specific behavior, because our ego’s addictions are hard-wired into our thinking, emoting, the way we feel and the way we perceive ourselves. How can we become empowered to end our inner struggle and be aware of our ego addictions?
In our ten year energy healing work experience we found out that our inner ego struggle can be one of the hardest aspects to address. Over the years we created a powerful platform and community for those of us who seek the space to explore and work with our egos. Our personal energy coaching and self-healing programs were created not only to help participants to overcome mental and emotional blocks manifesting their authentic self and higher goals, but also to show a new way of embracing their spiritual purpose and heart connection without any spiritual agenda.
The first step is always admitting that we are not really getting anywhere by doing things the way we always have. In energetic self-healing we call this point awakening. We feel the need to change something but we’re not sure yet how or even what. We begin to feel prompted to read certain subjects and we notice a yearning for a new understanding. It isn’t so much that we suddenly change our beliefs or that we ‘know things’ – it’s more like a resonance with deeper truth and purpose. The best way to describe the feeling is that we want more…
While most of us are embracing spiritual awaking as emergence, most of us underestimate the necessary spiritual emergency that comes with it. Basically, Awakening describes hitting spiritual rock bottom and in order to maneuver through this growth crisis we need to look at the patterns that got us here.
Intellectually, it doesn’t take rocket science to figure out that our results won’t change if we don’t change. Regardless of collective trends and circumstances, the way we make choices and decisions is rooted in our deepest core programming. We can read or talk about spiritual concept all day long, but as long as we don’t have a pathway for implementing those new insights into our practical lives, we can get stuck in the phase of never ending seeking. Hence, for most of us this new journey starts with a bit of disillusionment.
No matter what course or teaching we try, how many times we move or partners we leave behind, at the end of the day it’s not what we know, but how well we have learned to apply inner guidance to our 3D life experience.
The reason why we experience our spiritual or personal growth journey as so perilous is because we have no clue that what we are actually trying to evolve is our ego. The minute we begin to turn inward, meditate, reflect and become mindful – the struggle begins. There is our wakefulness driving us to exploring new realms of our consciousness and then there is our inertia trying to maintain everything the way it is, even if we already know that it’s dysfunctional.
What we are truly dealing with is not adverse circumstances, lack of money, not knowing what we want, unhappy relationships, or insufficient health – what we are dealing with is a conflict in our inner attitude towards ourselves! There is an inner battle between our conscious wanting to expand and our ego trying to keep everything the way it is – what’s most familiar to us. We are caught in our ego-addiction cycle.
A typical example for ego addiction is victimhood: On one hand we resent feeling like a doormat, being taking advantage of, or being unfairly treated, but on the other we go about our life with the attitude that we will somehow end up as victim anyway, and unconsciously embrace that it’s not us but others who are responsible for our misery. The secret payoff is that we don’t need to be responsible for anything. As long as our ego finds someone or something to blame, our inner ego cycle is reconfirmed and satisfied.
Sometimes we are so caught in this unconscious cycle that we project our victimhood outwardly in order to get attention, sympathy or justification for not changing. We are so used to not accomplishing what we want, that we are not even trying anymore. Our ego triumphs every time we feel confirmed and we unconsciously agree to staying where are at.
What makes our Ego so powerful? Why is so difficult to get past our Ego?
The biggest fear of our ego is not our unhappiness – its biggest fear is insignificance. What drives our ego into the heights of pretense, need to be validated, self-denial or attention seeking is the fear of the unknown. There is no greater threat to our ego than its own demise. Therefore, our struggle is not just some theoretical problem of how to become a happier person, it’s a full on battle with our ego’s fear of death.
We all know what our ego can make us do or not do. When dealing with our ego and its addictions we all in the same boat!
For our ego, our physical death is not just the end of our physical existence, but also the ultimate end of itself. So, while struggling with our ego addictions and trying get the upper hand again, we forget that it’s not our ego’s job is not to make us happy. Its ‘job’ is to keep us – itself – alive. And so, many of us find ourselves in a place of deep unhappiness, despair, anxiety and depression – but because our perception is clouded we can’t see a way out.
Of course, this is a somewhat simplified view of our inner and outer fears. The mechanics of our inner patterns is very complex, and thus produces a multitude of ego-layers: Conditioning, traumas, karmic propensities, cultural and collective programming, parental role behavior, family constellation, catastrophic external influences, etc. Together, they determine the way we deal with life and they determine the formation of our False Self, the part in us that copes with our fears of disconnection and ultimately death.
For some, these False Self coping mechanisms express in helplessness or the insatiable desire for attention; for others it’s the determination to control what is feared. No matter what our ‘drug of choice’ is the outcome is always the same: We feel disconnected, alone and unable to let go of unhealthy behaviors. This can range anywhere from unhealthy foods against our better knowing, over toxic relationships, jobs we hate, or substances or behaviors that ‘get us through’ whatever our pain is. We cope, protect, cover-up, defend, or give up.
In essence, our ego’s fear is our prime directive and until we are willing to take our inner power back, it will dominate our life’s experience!
This inner schism can only be healed through a shift in our perception and the practice of experiencing our inner connection. Bit by bit, we can internalize that the only thing in the way of being connected to our inner power is the fear of the absence of true inner heart connection.
Protection can be a very efficient tool for survival, but if we protect our hearts too much we can lose the ability to feel who we truly are – and with it what’s truly important to us. The process of re-connecting within requires us to drop our guards and to surrender to our Ego to our Inner Higher Power.
A while back, I quoted this quote from Steve Jobs and again today it touches me deeply. It reminds me on what why we are all so afraid of looking at our inner truth.
I briefly met Steven when he was in his early thirties and quite frankly didn’t like him very much back then; energetically, he appeared very mental and cold to me; but I liked the rebel in him! Anyway, today I regard his quote as profoundly wise. If we can look beyond the sad part of his physical death (no disrespect intended) we can realize that the true wisdom of these words doesn’t reveal itself until we can transpose this attitude to our every day life! Not that our fear of dying is to be ignored, but right now, our job is to live our life in the consciousness that our ego and all our fears, emotional, physical and mental dramas while incarnated in this existence, are only a very small part of who we truly are.
If we can weed out all resistances within us and create the space for overcoming our ego’s struggle – we can begin to manifest what is truly important in our life.
The ‘clouds’ blocking our heart from actualizing our true potential are nothing but our culminated ego defensive mechanisms, patterns and programs dealing with the fear of death – And the bigger the fear, the darker the clouds!
Instead of getting caught in the downward spiral of experiencing our ego worry to death – let’s face our fears and end the power of our ago-addiction!
If you feel motivated to take on this challenge and learn ‘The Art of Transcending Your Ego & Its Addictions, check out our 24 STEP Sacred Self-Healing Program that can guide you through this journey.
Sacred Self-Healing is a unique energy connecting and self-healing program suitable for everyone. Tt facilitates inner heart-connection on multiple levels of our energy system, and thus activates your innate spiritual and emotional intelligence. Starting by reactivating our inner heart-connection and opening up the world of perception and consciousness the program offers advanced energy work modalities taught 24 Steps. For only $39 per month this 12-month journey will change the way you perceive yourself, your inner power and the world live in!
Stay tuned for more on ego coping…
Thank you for your time!
Energy Healer, Founder of transCODES & Creator of the 24STEPS Sacred Self-Healing Journey
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